big mouths

My kids mouths are getting a little big for their...britches?  Now that doesn't make sense.  Big for their lips?  No.  Anyway, you get my drift.  (Or you don't, but keep reading anyway...)

BELLE:

Belle is almost 14 months old.  At such a mature age it doesn't seem unreasonable to expect her to use some simple words to help in everyday communication.  Some common ones would be

Mama
Dada
milk (or mulk or miewww or some such sound used consistently to ask for a drink)
cup
ball
more
please

You know, those sorts of things.  Of course they wouldn't exactly sound like those words, but an attentive mother should be able to decipher the noises that sound close to them. 

Belle, who seems to be styling herself as a bit of a rebellious-smarty pants, does not say a single one of these. 

If she wants her cup does she say cup? milk?drink? wa wa? juice?  Any form of anything close to these words?  No.  She whines and reaches.  Now she doesn't reach toward the cup, mind you.  How could she when she's closed her eyes and scrunched up her face to make the whine as whiny as possible?  She just reaches randomly and whines.  Leaving me saying (in my always sweet mommy voice), "What the hoot are you whining about!?!?"

So of course, like any good mother, I worry that she has some sort of mental delay. 

But if you listen closely to Belle, you will realize she is not stupid, she is just a verbal snob.  She is too good for one syllable words.  And most two syllable words.  She really only deigns to verbalize three syllables at a time.  For instance if she wants ANYTHING, does she say "That!" or "Dat!"? 

No,  she says, "Here ya go!!!"  It is very clearly "Here ya go!"  As though some benevolent power were handing her the thing she desires and saying to her, "Here you go!"  You should hear the constant chant of that as we maneuver through the grocery store and she strains to reach everything on the shelves.  It becomes something of a mantra.  "HERE ya goooo.   HERE ya goooo.  HERE ya goooo." 

And the other day I handed her a toy.  She said, "Tank youuuuu," and wandered off.  ...Um...you're welcome.

Any time she sees Medman, "Hi Daddeeeee!" 

Sadly enough when she sees me it's still, "Hi Daddeeeee!"  But that's better than nothing.  We've never actually been "mama" and "dada."  From the beginning it has been "Mommy" and "Daddy."

When she does anything she's proud of, it's a perfectly articulated "I did it!!"  This one is said a lot.  She's quite easily impressed with herself.  Maybe she climbed onto a small box.  Or put anything small into anything larger.  Or picked up the cup I just set 2" in front of her.  She stretches her neck out long and gives a huge goofy smile. "I did it!" 

So we've ruled out mental problems, but I do dearly wish she would decide that simple sounds like "cup" are useful words as well. 


D:

D's always been a big talker.  I think his small stature is due to the fact that he redirects any nutrients that enter his body to the parts of his brain that control increasing running speed and increasing verbal power. 

The other day we were in a rush to get out of the house.  For the 15 minutes before this he had been racing me at everything that we did.  Running this way, running that way.  Then I said, "Ok, time to go potty so we can go."

If it had been a cartoon you would have been able to hear the screech as his heels dug into the ground and he came to a halt.  He then continued walking at the speed of a 96-year-old woman who has just had hip replacement surgery.  I tried sweet, serious & stern.  Finally he was told in no uncertain terms that his little tushy better get up on that potty or ELSE! 

A sad little boy headed to the potty.  I went to change Belle's diaper and a few minutes later I hear a very deep, dramatic sigh of exasperation from the hallway.  In his most patient voice he said:

"Here's the thing, Mommy....I just really don't like it when you get mad because I don't go potty."

"Here's the thing!"  I died laughing.  Who says that?  Well, apparently Medman and I do, but still, quite funny.