Things I've had to hear this week...

D:  Crouton's don't bounce very high.

I don't believe I dignified that with an answer.

------------------------------------------------

Belle's answer to EVERYTHING:

Me: Belle!  Why did you just (throw your pancake? put your pancake in your hair? rub your pancake on your face? ask desperately for a pancake and then NOT EAT IT???)

Belle (looking earnestly at me):  Why 'cause, I told you.

Oh, thanks for clearing that up. 

-------------------------------------------------

And in the car my kids have been entertaining each other with silly faces. 

Silly face, gales of laughter, silly face, gales of laughter. 

So the other day when I was hearing moments of silence followed by peals of laughter I though lovingly of how nicely my kids were playing together.  But then I caught a flash of white in my rearview mirror and when I looked, a little white square fluttered behind my car and bounced off the van behind us.  While my brain is processing this I see another square of white flutter INSIDE the car, then whiz out the window. 

Peals of laughter.

That's when the brain recognized that little white square as a square of toilet paper. (Side Note: it had been less than 5 minutes since we had a conversation about what littering is and how it is BAD.  Very bad.)

Me  (yanking the rearview mirror down to see D behind me): WHAT ARE YOU DOING????

D (freezing wide-eyed and lowering his hands out of sight in the mirror): Um....you should keep your eyes on the road!

It is a sign of how annoyed I was that I consciously decided to file that response away for later, knowing I would then find it funny.

Me (pretending he had not spoken): ARE YOU THROWING TRASH OUT THE WINDOW OF THE CAR???

D: Um, the wind pulled it outside.

Me: WHY ON EARTH ARE YOU DOING THAT?!?!?!?!?

Belle: Why 'cause, I told you!


Me: (deep breath then launch into a long, motherly lecture on littering and especially doing something your mother had JUST told you not to do...yada yada...normal long-winded motherly rant ending with...)  I left that toilet paper back there so you could give pieces to Belle if she needed a tissue.  She's not big enough to get it for herself.   I thought you were big enough!"

Long dramatic pause.

D's subdued little voice pipes up: "Clearly you were mistaken."

At which time I had just enough self control to snap off a "Clearly!"  before dying in silent laughter in the front, grateful that he couldn't see me.